the time at night, from my first drink until the last bit of champagne california sparkling wine has chased down my 12.5mg of ambien. i feel stimulated - toujours créatif, toujours original, always the highlight of my night. at first i feel nothing save for the burp that comes from swallowing too much carbonated grape juice in one breath. next, the random reading of email/twittering/tumblring that follows for a good fifteen minutes. (nothing is accomplished; the “save as unread” is my best friend.) then, finally, the small explosion in the upper-right-centre part of my brain that lets me know all the chemical reactions have occurred; i’m under its spell until i lose consciousness for a few short, dreamless hours.
i live for that feeling of being alive, every night. its not a drug, its my own brain, amplified and electrified. slanted and enchanted. like a bipolar amnesiac.
Brian-Michel is/est:
